I never told anyone this story. I felt the desire to share my story with you.
Throughout my upbringing, my family and I went to Sunday mass every week. My stories and values were etched in my cells by my family, friends, and the educational system. Being so young and naive, I didn’t have the awareness to think otherwise.
As a teenager, I taught catechism for a few years.
I was standing in front of a third-grader classroom, with my youngest sister sitting in the front row. I remember looking across the room at the cross hanging on the wall. It had the I.N.R.I etched on the bottom of the cross; initials for the Latin title that Pontius Pilate had written over the head of Jesus Christ on the cross (John 19:19). “Jesus of Nazareth, the King of the Jews.”
I found myself transported to another place/time, and in the middle of this “space,” Jesus appeared to me. Yes. Jesus. Jeshua. He told me, “what you are teaching the youngsters is not the truth. It has been distorted. Go seek the truth, for you will know in time”.
Wait!!!!! What are you talking about? Come baaaaack!!!!
I swore minutes passed by, but when I returned and looked at my sister’s smiling face with her hands folded on top of the desk, no one was the wiser. Time stood still. I don’t recall what passage or topic we were discussing that day. All that I recalled was meeting him left a huge impact on me. That was the last year I taught Sunday school and the beginning of my soul searching.
During the next few years, I was busy searching for something I didn’t know how to find. I joined a bible class. I attended various Christian denominations, temples, and major world religions. I spoke to many people about their faith, religion, and God.
When I started this journey of finding meaning in what I heard, I thought it would be easy. I thought I had it all figured out, but I didn’t.
Again and again, I found myself wrestling with the same thought, “how do I tell someone what I heard.” Was it Jesus or a fragment of my imagination?
The seed was planted. He was my reminder. I knew I wasn’t meant to be “lost” for long…eventually, I was meant to find myself, discover my true nature, and discover love at my core.
Life has a sneaky way of allowing “time” to pass by. After 30 years, I hit the reset button and started a new relationship with myself and the inevitable discomfort of unlearning old bad habits. I also began a different relationship with the wise and loving being known as Jesus Christ.
Today, love has been at the forefront of my experiences. Love requires vulnerability. It continues to be a heart-opening experience that constantly shifts how I see the world and myself.
I was searching FOR when all along, the answer was within me. He was simply the catalyst for me.